OffThePost.org

New format! 3 teams per division make the playoffs, plus two wildcard teams in the conference as a whole. For out of playoff teams, you just order them 9-14 or 9-16 depending on if it's the West or East.

East

Atlantic: Detroit, Montreal, Ottawa
Metropolitan: NY Rangers, Pittsburgh, NY Islanders
Wildcards: Boston, Washington
9-16: New Jersey, Philadelphia, Florida, Carolina, Tampa Bay, Toronto, Columbus, Buffalo

West

Central: St. Louis, Chicago, Dallas
Pacific: Los Angeles, San Jose, Anaheim
Wildcards: Vancouver, Phoenix

9-14: Minnesota, Nashville, Edmonton, Colorado, Winnipeg, Calgary

Presidents Trophy: St. Louis Blues
Stanley Cup: Los Angeles
Draft Lotto Favs: Buffalo

Hart: Crosby
Norris: Doughty
Vezina: Howard
Art Ross: Stamkos
Richard: Stamkos
Calder: Thomas Hertl (Sharks)
First Coach Fired: Laviolette

_________________
Injustice? Cobain died and Eddy Fucking Vedder lived to haunt us with his shitty fucking voice, trite lyrics and his Eddy Vedderness.



- Ancient Chinese Proverb

The rushed for time version.

East.

In. Boston, Detroit, NY Rangers, Pittsburgh,
Out. New Jersey,Florida, Tampa Bay, Buffalo

Everyone else fighting for the last four playoff spots.

West

In. St. Louis, Chicago, Los Angeles, San Jose
Out. Edmonton, Colorado, Winnipeg, Calgary

Everyone else fighting it out.

East

Atlantic: Detroit, Montreal, Boston
Metropolitan: Pens, Rangers, Washington
Wildcards: NYI, Ottawa
9-16: Columbus, Toronto, Jersey, Philadelphia, Florida, Carolina, Tampa Bay, Buffalo

West

Central: Chicago, St. Louis, Dallas
Pacific: Los Angeles, San Jose, Vancouver,
Wildcards: Anaheim, Phoenix

9-14: Minnesota, Edmonton, Nashville, Colorado, Winnipeg, Calgary

Presidents Trophy: Detroit
Stanley Cup: Los Angeles
Draft Lotto Favs: Calgary

Hart: Tavares
Norris: Doughty
Vezina: Lundqvist
Art Ross: Stamkos
Richard: Tavares
Calder: Nelson (Isles) (Not too much homerism here, huh? )
First Coach Fired: Rolston

Other random predictions (severe East Coast bias- but at least I admit it):
Crosby gets hurt & misses a month.
DiPietro signs with an ECHL team to try & revive his career. It doesn't go well.
Brad Richards has resurgence (darn it).
Lundqvist plays incredibly well for a long frigging time.
John Tavares shows the league why he was the #1 pick & nets 45 G.
Nabokov doesn't play well & the Isles pull something off to get a legit #1.
I still don't pay attention to the Western Conference.
Hybrid icing is nixed mid-season. But the league suggests 3 more rule changes.
Kessel and John Scott become good friends, but don't go golfing together, despite both having time in April.
Isles re-match with Pens in first round & win their first round in 21 years. I injure myself celebrating.
Patrick Roy flips on a ref mid-game & starts screaming "Do you know who I am??? Do YOUUUU know who IIIIIIIIIIII am?"
Gretzky's daughter revives Twitter account, to the initial delight of male fans. But she posts pics of food she's cooked, her little dog and other annoying things.
John Tortorella pisses off media in Vancouver. Local pot bar runs ads inviting him to come chill out in their mellowing space.
Jagr still plays well. Starts becoming more weird though, trying for the Bryzgolov Title of Oddity. DeBoer calls him an asshole on video.
Philly's goalies forget how to play. Emery has rage issues & gets suspended for throwing stick at glass.
Bryzgolov signs for pretty cheap. Maybe with the Isles.
We are all glad hockey is back, on time this year.

_________________
Posting your political views on social media is like sticking your head up your ass & whispering: You're just as likely to change someone's mind, and you'll always come out looking like a shithead.

East

Atlantic: Boston, Ottawa, Montreal
Metropolitan: Pittsburgh, Philly, Washington
Wildcards: Toronto, NYI


West

Central: St. Louis, Chicago, Minnesota
Pacific: Los Angeles, San Jose, Anaheim
Wildcards: Phoenix, Edmonton



Presidents Trophy: Boston
Stanley Cup: San Jose
Draft Lotto Favs: Calgary

Hart: Tavares
Norris: OEL
Vezina: Niemi
Art Ross: Tavares
Richard: Stamkos
Calder: Thomas Hertl (Sharks)
First Coach Fired: Claude Noel

_________________

East

Atlantic: Detroit, Boston, Montreal
Metropolitan: Pittsburgh, Washington, NYR
Wildcards: Ottawa, NYI


West

Central: St. Louis, Chicago, Dallas
Pacific: Los Angeles, San Jose, Vancouver
Wildcards: Phoenix, Anaheim



Presidents Trophy: Detroit
Stanley Cup: St. Louis
Draft Lotto Favs: New Jersey Winnipeg

Hart: Toews
Norris: Weber
Vezina: Rask
Art Ross: Tavares
Richard: Stamkos
Calder: Seth Jones (NSH)
First Coach Fired: Mike Yeo

I don't understand the new divisions at all.

Adams: Wings, Bruins, Canadiens
Patrick: Penguins, Islanders, Capitals
Wild Cards: Senators, Rangers

Norris: Blues, Wild, Hawks
Smythe: Sharks, Kings, Ducks
Wild Cards: Oil, Preds

Finals: Penguins vs. Blues
Stanley Cup Winner: Penguins
Lotto: Flames

Hart: Crosby
Norris: Weber
Vezina: Price
Art Ross: Tavares
Richard: Ovechkin
Calder: MacKinnon
First Coach Fired: Muller

_________________

Here's my prediction - I won't be following the NHL until Gary Bettman is no longer NHL commissioner. I'm sorry but he and the rest of the prevaricators running the NHL have ruined it for me and I've been an NHL fan since 1969. I suppose I will have to wait for Jacobs and Snider to die before that happens but as a fan and more importantly a customer, I'm sick of the lack of respect they show me and will not spend my money and interest on this group of liars and cheats. Life's too short for that. I will be around here posting in ChitChat and other forums and I'll get my hockey fix by following the WHL Vancouver Giants but for now it's time to say sayanora to the NHL.

Me neither.

_________________
GO CANUCKS GO!

I don't get why they named a division after Glen Metropolit. He seems like a good guy and everything but not really worthy of such an honor IMO.

_________________

I change my "lotto pick" favorite from Winnipeg to Calgary. Winnipeg looks somewhat decent on paper.

Do people honestly think Buggalo is gonna be worse than Calgary this year?

Zegmus Girgensons made their roster on merit. He had like 22 points in the AHL last year.

_________________
Injustice? Cobain died and Eddy Fucking Vedder lived to haunt us with his shitty fucking voice, trite lyrics and his Eddy Vedderness.



- Ancient Chinese Proverb

Sorry to read this, but I totally understand. Thing is, much as Gary Bettman is an incompetent and arrogant asshole, he's a mouthpiece for the league, and it was the Board of Governors who drove both these lockouts. Bill Daly would be a better commissioner no doubt, but he's not much different than Bettman. In the end, you should be rooting for the death of Jeremy Jacobs. Yes, I know that's macabre, and a certain crown prosecutor in Vancouver would most certainly blast me for saying something so egregious, but it's not until someone as wantonly greedy and shortsighted as him finally goes away that you'll likely see the league run better than some old boys' club. It wasn't until Dollar Bill Wirtz finally took the dirt nap that the franchise he had run into complete irrelevance made a swift and decisive return to a model franchise. Once Jacobs is gone, I think you'll see a slightly better NHL. Much better? No...unfortunately there will always be greedy tools with too much money and not enough sense like Eugene Melnyk and Andy Katz, but Jacobs represents something far worse than mere stupidity--and his overbearing presence on the BOG won't allow any new ideas in the room.

Two games in, I guess you're right. Buffalo doesn't even look like they're trying.

Well I shit the bed on most of these. Do we have a scoring system? I'd like to point out a few bold random Eastern Conference predictions I made.

_________________
Posting your political views on social media is like sticking your head up your ass & whispering: You're just as likely to change someone's mind, and you'll always come out looking like a shithead.

I was pretty high on the Islanders. I was pretty high at the time.

_________________

Hertl would've won the Calder if not for fucking Dust-fucking fuck Brown.

_________________
Injustice? Cobain died and Eddy Fucking Vedder lived to haunt us with his shitty fucking voice, trite lyrics and his Eddy Vedderness.



- Ancient Chinese Proverb

Agreed.

Did anyone predict that cup-checks would be the signature move of these playoffs? :wtf

Edit- These will be remembered as the 2013-14 Stanley Cup-check Playoffs. (thought of that line later in the day. shrug)

_________________
Posting your political views on social media is like sticking your head up your ass & whispering: You're just as likely to change someone's mind, and you'll always come out looking like a shithead.

Couldn't have said it better.

Seriously? Getzlaf and Brown both nominated for the Mess award? I guess it's a bullshit award so it should get bullshit nominees.